It's been a while since I've written to this blog. I wondered why I was having such a hard time getting motivated. Then I realized it's because The Stern Show has been lacking in motivation. Perhaps it's due to Howard's metamorphosis into the ultimate anti-motivational speaker.
Stern's favorite exit line, "What else Robin?" is constantly quoted by fans as indicative of Howard's malaise. Some revolution.
Remember when us Stern Fans cared about all the feuds, and carrying on between Stern Show Staffers? We were totally invested in Grillo and Gange's refusal to leave Stuttering John's sublet apartment, Howard's basement fish tank, and hi-tech toys fascinated us, the saga that was Fred's marriage was our favorite soap opera, and more. In short Howard cared, and so did we.
Contrast this with the Stern Show of today. Despite how much Howard, Robin, and Gary try to force the issue, we really don't care about the saga of Artie the Junkie. Everything on the show has to be over-hyped because it's uninspired.
I for one refuse to throw good money after bad by subscribing to Stern on Demand. Too much of a good thing is not necessarily a good thing. And from my vantage point terrestrial radio is looking mighty tasty. What does it say when the most popular, such as it is, episodes of Stern on Demand are not episodes of The Stern Show, but Sal's Show in The Hallway? -- not that I've seen either.
The State of the State of the Stern Show mirrors the sorry state of our country -- broke, over-extended, and dreaming of the glory days of yesteryear. Will Artie show up? How can we make fun of Gary? Who will be the one-thousandth whore to ride the Sybian? When will Richard and Sal whip out their junk? When will we get to hear another awful Ashley Madison or Cash for Gold commercial?
If Howard could turn a profit turning his fans into heroin-mainlining junkies he wouldn't hesitate for a second. Is it really surprising that legions of Stern Fans have stopped caring about Howard, when it's more obvious with each passing show that Howard has stopped caring about us? Or did he ever care? Maybe we're just extras in Howard's megalomaniacal autobiography.
For Howard Shrine Spews and Views, this is I. Humphrey saying, "Those were the days beyaaatch!"
